The Loss of a Pet
Writing about the loss of pet in not easy specially when the decision was mine.
BABY was her name….She was a Shih-tzu that my husband bought for me back in 2006 from an ad on the Miami Herald. She was the only female left from the litter. I did notice that she was very shy and so I fell in love with her and brought her home. She was with me for 12 years, and I would like to think that I gave her the best life possible.
She was not your loving playful dog, but I knew she loved her family. She was such a great family pet.
She was a healthy dog up until 2016 when I noticed her eyes getting cloudy. A few days earlier my youngest while playing on the sofa, lost his balance and fell on top of baby’s bed where she had been laying, so when I saw my baby’s eye and noticed the cloudy eyes, I thought it was trauma caused by my son falling on her. I took her to the Veterinarian and told them what had happened a few days earlier and gave them my opinion. After some test, the Veterinarian told me that it was just a coincidence that the fall and my pet’s eye condition happen at the same time but that what my baby had was an eye condition not cause by trauma. My baby had a genetic condition called Corneal Endothelial degeneration that caused multiple blisters in her eyes that pop and cause painful corneal ulcers, this is typical of poor breeding and that as time goes by she will eventually go blind. For months she had to wear an e-collar to prevent her from bumping into items that may injure her eyes even more. After months of her not getting any better, they recommended that I take her to see an eye specialist. After searching several, I chose to take her to Animal Eye Guys for a consultation, as they were the experts on pet eye conditions. She was put on more eye drops, ointments and pills to prevent infections. I even had her undergo a surgery that unfortunately, did not improve her condition. They suggested another surgery which did not guarantee improvement, I decided not to go through the second surgery. I was also advised by her first Veterinarian to remove her eyes before they get infected. I wanted another opinion so I changed veterinarians. I went to see Dr. Jeffrey Davidson whom had been my first pet’s Veterinarian back in the late 80’s. I asked for his opinion on removing my Baby’s eyes and he said why put her through the pain, he suggested that as long as she has a good quality life to treat her eye condition with eye drops to make it less painful. I chose to go that route and for almost a year she was on eye drops and every now and then drops for her eye infections. I think she knew that I was trying to take care of her the best I could. My Baby was such a trooper, she was such a great pet.
Summer of last year was a crazy time, dealing with my son’s ankle injury, his surgery and recuperation and now my baby was not acting like herself. I came home from work to find her , in the same position I had left her in the morning, in the morning, she did not want to walk when I carried her outside, she had not eaten either. I offered her some food and she was not having it. I would lift her up and she would just drop down. I was worried. I rushed her to the vet and they wanted to run all these test that would cost a lot of money only to tell me that most likely her eye condition had worsen and she was in too much pain. I believe that my baby new it was time and seeing her in that condition, I took the decision to put her to sleep. We made the arrangements for the following day. The veterinarian assistants told me to take her home and love her, baby her, pamper her, feed her her favorite food and so I did. I had her laying on my bed telling her that I loved her and that I would miss her and how wonderful of a pet she has been.
The day arrived. I came home from work, I placed her in her kennel and drove to the veterinarian’s office. I was crying on my way there and telling her that I was sorry that I couldn’t do more for her. My husband met me at the veterinarian office as he wanted to be there for support.
She took her last breath
They took us into one of the rooms, we signed the paperwork and the assistants started prepping her, shaving her leg for the iv. They gave her a sedative to relax her. I said my goodbye to her and kissed her. I couldn’t watch anymore. They told me if I was ready and I turned my back to them when they told me it was done. I caught a glimpse of her lying still on her side. I remember screaming and sobbing, I turned to my husband and to my surprise, he too had tears rolling down his face.
I went home and just got in my bed, definitely one of the worse days of my life.
It has been a year since I made the difficult decision of putting her to sleep, and although I miss her when I think about her, I don’t mourn her loss. I would like to think that it is because I know that I did the right thing for her.
Baby’s favorite food was pizza crust and Cheetos and of course me. Baby was scared of thunder as all dogs are she, will scratch my kids bedroom doors so they can let her in when I wasn’t home.